The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2010)

2 Feb

Ho…ly…shit.                                         Here we go again, with a movie so disturbing, so foul, so awkward…that it has been recommended to and associated with me by several people. Once again, I am both offended, but kind of flattered. Don’t get me wrong, this is a horrific movie to be associated with, but I am happy to have the reputation of someone who can stomach such disturbing material. Stomaching The Human Centipede (First Sequence) barely happened for me, however. I have not come this close to becoming physically ill during a movie since Salo.

In this movie, a German mad scientist/doctor, Dr. Heiter, sets out to fulfill a sadistic dream of his to bond humans (American and Japanese tourists abroad in Germany) to one another to form a “human centipede.” In his career days as a surgeon, Dr. Heiter separated Siamese twins for a living. Now retired, and after testing this experiment on some Rottweilers,  he wants to combine people instead. For a doctor, Heiter seems to have chosen an abnormally crude, elementary and ineffective way to link these people together. The fashion in which he decides to attach these people I will not discuss here, but it is definitely quite distinct from the way in which Siamese twins are traditionally attached. Dr. Heiter even goes as far as to explain to his victims ahead of time how he plans on going about connecting them through this grotesque surgery via a lovely overhead projector presentation.

I think that the biggest spoiler I could include in this entry would be to tell you how these people are attached. So I won’t provide that information. I mean I can handle a horror butcher film, and it doesn’t really impress me. I mean, you won’t see me writing a movie review about Saw or anything, just because it comes up with outlandish ways to torture people. Furthermore, The Human Centipede isn’t even necessarily all that graphic. It doesn’t need to be. Your mind will take you to that dark place.

I want to hate this movie…But I’m kind of intrigued by it. I think I want to tell you to see it, but I won’t. Because then you will blame me for the mental anguish and nightmares it will bring upon you.

I kind of want to give this movie a B, but only as a joke. Because in the human centipede, the last person you want to be is person B. *huge shudder* Poor Lindsay…

Would I see this movie again? I rrrreally think one time is enough for me. But if you are like me and you enjoy testing the limits of sanity and decency in film, along with your own threshold for viewing the most disturbing shit a writer/director can possibly fabricate…give this movie a try. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.


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